bet’s

Just dunno wot 2 say,, gw bingung,, feels like I’m in d middle of nowhere again,, semua numpuk jd satu,, g tau mo ngapain,, milih yg mn? Everything has its own consequences,, gw bingung!! Help me pliz..

Pdhal kmrn gw udh mantap ingin ‘ride d camels’,, tp skrg? Gosh… I dunno…

God,, help me to choose d best one which is Yours

Moga dlm perjalanan pulang gw k rmh ini,, gw bs menemukan jawabannya. AMIN!

Pasti bingung,, he3 sebenarnya itu istilah yg digunakan saat ibadah YAF minggu lalu. It was so funny, I was laughing out loud… Bener2 lucu,, smp airmata mo keluar rasanya he3.

Well, ‘Ride d camels’ means that we have to ride the camels even though its smell so stinky, not comfortable, etc. It’s a story abt Rebecca, when she agreed to marry Isaac *?* But dat’s not d prob..

D prob is happen .. until I experienced that moment,, that I have to ‘ride my own camels’ and that aint funny at all!! Hiks,, so bad.. I even cried *so embarassing :p*

It’s about my job,, bknnya gw g bersyukur dat God already gimme diz job,, ngga sama sekali!!Malah gw bersyukur bgt, coz God gimme a job dat’s beyond my expectations!! Gw seneng bs di sini, but it feels like I dont belong here. Coz I don’t like uncertainty,, one of many things that I hate is uncertainty.. and it’s my job description, hi3 so silly,, only coz of job description :p

Tp lama kelamaan semuanya menumpuk,, gw penuh kebimbangan,, feels like everything against me.. n I started to think whether this job is for me or not.. Feels like I want to quit, resign n find another one,, well, a company phoned me n asked me 2 have an interview with them,, but I rejected *WOT* temen gw blg ‘ih sayang bgt’ n so on.. (coz it’s a gr8 company)

I dunno why, but in the beginning I’ve already set my heart to work in this area,, n my 1st chance is at KP, though at the same time,, I also got accepted at WVI.. *aargghh so confusing*

In the middle of my perplexity, I remembered the ‘ride d camels’ thing *hahaha* mebbe diz is my camels,, like it or not,, I’ve to go through it,, coz this is my decision.. n I’m not a quitter!!! I wont stop everything that I’ve already started..

So from now on,, I’m gonna enjoy my camels,, n ride it till I arrive at my destination N I know U wont leave me ;;) Tha’

Hv u ever heard this song? It’s Don Moen’s song. Gw udh dgr berkali2, tp br bbrp hari yg lalu gw bener2 mendalami arti lagu ini.. Yup, di saat gw ngerasa it’s been such a long time I never count my blessings again… Bknnya gw g pernah bersyukur atas semua yg udh dikasih Tuhan, but I used to spend time just to figure out every single blessings that my family and I get.. How abt NOW? Gosh, I hardly have time to do something else beside my works.. well, ada sih waktu lowong, tp biasanya utk istirahat or melakukan hal2 yg ringan, kl yg lainnya NO WAY… gmn yah, gw kn butuh istirahat he3.. bela diri neh

Anyway.. hingga suatu malam, gw lg ngerjain tugas laporan (abis kerjaan numpuk, kl g dicicil di rmh mana kelar??..), n I played this song.. Can u imagine? Di saat gw suntuk, stres, bosen dgn rutinitas gw yg baru ini, tugas g ada habis2nya.. n gw cm bs teriak, menggerutu, sebel. Tp gw bertekad tuk ngerjain kok, krn kl cm teriak dll toh never make my jobs done rite? :p he3 ini gw dpt dr Mbk Candra… her speech helped me

Then I heard this song again… Wonderful Magnificent God! Yes LORD.. U r wonderful.. U r magnificent n U r my God! U’ve done many things in my life.. I start to think n count my blessings.. u know wot.. it’s ABUNDANT!!! Wow Lord, U r smashing! Tha’!

Semakin gw berpikir… semakin banyak hal yg patut gw syukuri… dari hal sepele sampai yang tidak sepele he3, dari yg gw dapatkan sampai yg keluarga gw dapatkan. Mmh, banyak hal! Even d bad things that happened.. if I see it in "other point of view" can b blessings too

Soal pekerjaan, walopun bnyk hal yg msh membebani pikiran gw, but thx God I found it gw jd inget di saat gw sendiri lg berpikir keras ttg gawean gw, eits trnyt ada temen yg curhat ttg gaweannya jg..mmh, gw jd punya tmn utk share kan.. ada jg yg kirim imel ttg kisah gawean,, seems everybody know what I’m goin through n they want to share it with me.. belum lg ucapan Mbk Candra yg bikin mata hati gw kebuka.. Yeah, gotta do something, instead of just thinking abt it :p made me so embarassed…

Keluarga gw yg makin bs tersenyum.. after diz horrible years!!! Blm lg keluarga besar yg makin kompak My 1st bro who hs just finishd his 2nd degree, my 2nd bro yg makin asik aja *luv ya* ade gw yg makin lucu :p, not 2 4get 2 mention my housekeeper! Thx God 4 having u in my family, she’s been part of our family for 6 years!! Thx God! I wont 4get my promise 2 myself abt u n ur son, mbak ;;) luv all of u…

How abt friends? Mmh.. gw punya banyak temen yg OK!!! Friends from d past n present… Thx God gw dikelilingi oleh orang2 yg TOP.. lotta things happen between us.. but u know wot, it makes our friendship is getting stronger each day! As all of us know, good friends will always there whenever u need them.. dat’s true! Mungkin hanya SMS ato telepon singkat ato imel norax he3 just to say hello,, but I do really appreciate it! Though sometimes I can’t stop thinking abt some friends that seems already 4gotten me,, I wonder how they are? N hope they r OK.. well, better to think positive rite ;;) I loves my friends, wotever happens that it may hurts me.. I’m still ur friend..

Not to mention all d small things.. obrolan gw dgn tukang ojek :p office boys dgn segala keanehannya he3, senyuman satpam kantor alias Mbak Tuti.. blm lg kl dia ngomong "Alo Cantik.." he3,, though it’s only chit-chat, tp tersanjung boooo… asal g tersandung aja he3. Makanan ringannya Mbak Upi n Libby :p lelucon ringan dr temen2 yang lain.. blm lg kl jln k dpn kantor utk naik angkot.. pohon2 yg rindang, suara KA yg berisik he3, lampu2 jalan di malam hari, macet.. yg bikin gw belajar utk sabar.. n melatih diri utk tidak merasa cpt bosen he3.

Wah.. ternyata banyak ya.. sbnrnya sih bs lbh bnyk lg… but I think d main thing is His grace is abundant! I’ve 2 b grateful of it.. Thx Lord..

PS> Gw nulis ini diiringi oleh KENNY G.. mmmh, makin kerasa dh berkatnya he3,, though I’v 2 postpone my works 4 a while he3… oh ya, satu berkat lagi.. gw bs les Bhs Inggris gretongan, walopun tdk ngaruh k gw :p